My favorite hello and my hardest good-bye

I’m in pain. My heart aches and my life feels empty. Earlier this week, I had to put my baby girl down. Her body was done. Her mind and determination to be with me, wasn’t, but everything was failing.

I’ve had a few days without her and I have to say these have been some of the hardest days that I have had.

Losing a family member is hard. Whether it is a mother, uncle, grandparent, sibling, or a dog. They are part of your life and help shape you into who you are. They are there, unconditionally, to love you. So no matter who it is, the pain is real and the pain is unbearable.

I guess I wanted to write this to share her story. I think the world needs to know about her and just how special this one was.

She was my friend’s dog’s litter and was the runt. I knew I always wanted a runt, but when I held her in my hands for the first time, I knew that this one was the one…my soul dog. I named her Lil Runt, which then turned into Lily (but she still had her rapper aura). She was a little stinker when she was little. Her mom sat on her

and she stopped breathing and had to get resuscitated. She got to meet my grandpa and play with him months before he passed away. He was so happy that day. She would run around my apartment in Chicago and hide everywhere, literally everywhere. She liked jumping on the couch and looking out the window and then climbing on your back and biting your ears. She went everywhere with me in Chicago – restaurants, friend’s houses, the beach, etc. We were inseparable.

After moving back to Michigan, my husband and I wanted to get a house. We knew we wanted to live on the water and part of that decision was made because Lily needed to swim. She was a true water dog and we wanted to give her the water. And we did. She learned to dock jump, ignore any and all requests to get out of the water and become a lake dog. She played in kiddie pools with her ball and sinkies. If there was one place in the world that would make her happy, it was in or by the water.

Lily was my ride or die. That may sound funny to you if you haven’t had this connection before, but she was at my side every second of every day that we were together. I went upstairs to get something from my room, she was right behind. I would take a shower – she may come in or sit outside the shower. Sitting on the couch or working in the office – never left my side. She knew all my fears, pain, secrets, etc. Her and I would sit on my bed or swing in the hammock, and I would just talk to her, and she would listen. She would always listen.

She was always up for adventures. Whether it was traveling, hiking, walking, boating, trying new foods and everything inbetween, she was right there, tongue out and a big smile on her face.

Lily taught me so much. She taught me how to love and to be loved. She taught me loyalty, compassion, patience, understanding and friendship.

She was my world and I was hers.

My heart feels like someone Indiana Jonesed it, took a machete and split it in half and threw one half out the window of a steam engine. My heart will ache for the rest of my life, but I am forever in her debt of being the best thing to happen to me.

Good-bye my baby girl. There will never be a day that I don't think about you. I love you.